Any given day to start

Today is one of those days where I wake up and I feel like I almost don't recognize me anymore. The fact that I can look back and see where I am or how I got here is kinda moot. Before this feeling keeps bottling up more and more I need to actually do something about it otherwise it will explode, and doesn't lead to anything good.
Sigh. The fact that I've neglect feelings or refuse to give myself time to have some outlet really hinders my capacity to do anything. Then so many things accumulate that it seems mind boggling to try to sort through it all. If this doesn't make sense it's probably because of my acute ability to say a lot but not really get to the point.

Where to start? Does it matter? I mean when you got so much crap to sort in your head, your drawer, your garage, etc, anywhere you begin is good. In that respect then, I guess I'll start with what is most recent. This last month or two I've had a lot of ideas and sparks of creativity but for some reason or another I don't do anything about it. Which sucks because I look around me and see people getting a lot of things done. Not paying attention to the fairness or equality of the comparison between me and whoever, I just don't do anything. Gah, I don't even feel like I can make sense of my thoughts. Mm.. I remember when I used to do freestyle writing just for the hell of it. That is what this post feels like, the big difference is I'm not trying to free style. I do think anything that you learn and stop doing sorta rusts and is not as quick/sharp/efficient but the upside is that when you pick it up again it's like picking up the bicycle. Once you learned it, it will come back to you. Such is my writing this day. Such are my thought processes. Such are my actions. Too much freestyle, no control, no pushing of limits, no exercise.

One drawback of having so much stuff kept inside is that when you open up everything wants to come out surging. In my case I can feel exasperated that I can't write it all or that I can't keep up with my thoughts. It's a loss of balance, where I want to release some of the internal pressure but it's too much to control so it all just burst out, in order to stop it all has to be shut. In a world of intentions only actions count. This is my effort to slowly release the clutter and regain balance.

I'm not perfect.

Constantly tumbling and falling to pieces, only to pick them up in the same order. I loathe this habitual gravity that I can't seem to escape.

I want to break free and stop trying to be perfect, I want to try and fail and try again and again.

For I will not be the unachievable but just a little better every day.

A week update

Well, I have been keeping with the exercise well. Only one day that I took off from doing exercise. Also I got an agenda and I started using it right after I got it. I'm really trying to get into good habits. Most of my life I've had someone do a lot of things for me, so you could say I've been spoiled. No more. This is short update because I'm trying to sleep more and it's past my bed time. lol

What's next in 2011

These are my goals for 2011.

Short, simple and to the point.

Health and Fitness
1. Run/Exercise every weekday.
2. Reduce my belly size 39 inches to 36.
3. Reduce and keep weight of 82 kilos (~180 lbs).
4. Complete 100 push-up challenge.
5. Complete the 200 sit-ups challenge.

Academics
1. Learn Spring.
2. Learn CCS3 and HTML5.
3. Read a book per month.
4. Read both grammar books I got in 2010.
5. Help Carolina with one Spanish lesson every weekend.
6. Code in different languages mini-projects that my brother gets.

Health
1. Sleep 7-8 hours daily.
2. Pray/Meditate once per day.
3. Reduce sugar(s) that I eat by half.
4. When given an option for a side dish go for the salad or the healthiest possible.

Development/Tech
1. Setup carlosapg.com
2. Setup main page for carnator.com

Home Improvement
1. 2 Fridays a month spend the evening cooking or baking with Caro.
2. Build my own standing desk.

Time Management
1. Get agenda and use it daily.
2. No more than 5 hours per week on videogames and no more than 1.5 hours per day.

Finance
1. Have a limit of $50 when going out to eat per month.
2. Update our budget to focus even more on building an even stronger savings.

Just being honest.. #001

When I see profile pictures of (grown) people with an infant, the first thing I think of is: "Is that their child?"

Then if it is, I think: "Ok, they are proud to be parents.. cool. I wonder if I'll do that when I have kids of my own.. mm I'm hungry.. etc"

If it's not their kid: "Mmmm.. I don't know.. that can be either very creepy or touching.."

A round-up of 2010

So I'm looking at my goals for 2010 and well, I didn't do good. I'm being upfront on my blog because I want to remind myself of this fact and then work harder this year.

In Technology I did horribly having done none of my goals. The only thing that comes remotely close is having put this blog on a new domain. My domain, w00t! Final score: 5%.

Academics was a little better but still nothing to be super exited about. I did not learn Python per se, but I did code with this language so it's a good start. No mootools. Books I did read a few but not 2 per month as I intended. On Museums  we did visit a couple here in the US and a bunch when we visited Mexico. So here I would give it 50%.

Health... Meh, I think I did good the first half of the year and then after summer I totally failed. 40%.

Gaming. I even didn't do so good on my favorite hobby. While it should be comforting that this is such an optional goal it's something that didn't get completed. So here I got a 50%.

Family, Friends and Entertainment. This is my second best category but still not great. 65%.

Finally, Time and Money Management. This is my best. 80%

And now for some statistics:
Overall completion - 48.33%

2010 yielded more posts for me than 3 years prior in this blog. I'm not including the posts I did on other blogs. So that is good.

Next up, 2011 goals and resolutions.

-C