Un leve agradecimiento

Gracias, por ese momento que decidiste aceptarme en tu vida que me hizo sentir vivo.

Gracias, por escuchar esta alma dolida que no podía escapar.

Gracias, por el toque de tus labios que me sacaron de mi jaula, que me regresaron el sentido del gusto.

Gracias, por aceptarme como soy, quebrado y pleno, incompleto y completo, iluso y realistas, secreto y verdadero.

Gracias, por el primer 'te quiero', siempre será contestado.

Gracias, te amo.

Frases incompletas, deudas y promesas.

Siento que no llegan las palabras a mi boca,
¿Porque la voz no suelta y desahoga?
Potencial por dentro, revuelto, inquieto.
No se deja definir al no poder salir.

Frases incompletas, deudas y promesas.
Un laberinto sin salida, limbo definido.

Entre quejas y molestias, sueños incompletos,
Me recuerdas a la mala suerte con objetivos revueltos.

Quiero qué te vayas y no me acoses,

Porque el eclipse que proyectas se ve y se siente cerca.

Poco falta para que sea obseno, con gusto lo prometo,

Bien sabrás el límite de mi paciencia, es alto más no infinito,

El que busca encuentra, mi furia está cerca,

Sin aviso no hay engaño, ya no soy tu payaso.

Palabras una vez escritas, solas cobran vida,
Contigo son veneno, tu justicia sin salida.
Reclamos del pasado que en la tumba yacían,
No les das descanso, son torturas clandestinas.

Ojitos

You know this, your eyes, yes, your eyes...
Those where I see the starts, those that have an infinite depth.
I'm afraid at times, such beauty, I don't feel lost, just in awe.
I close my vision, I can picture those eyes of yours. The colors of my galaxy.
Even as I write this without form, the thought of your eyes guides my sentiment.
I feel you from a distance, your warmth corresponded by mine.
I'm happy too, when I gaze into your eyes, and now that they are within me,
I know that I will always have that light.
And when I feel alone, when I miss you the most, I only have to look at the night sky,
for your eyes are the stars, and in the stars, I see your eyes.
Those eyes, yes, those eyes...

The life you bring.

You don't stop your comfort and sweet care,

It gives life and desire to plunge and be within you.

You must know what you do to me,

Because I can see what I do to you.

Whatever is written in the wall, is too far to see,

Whatever is spoken in the wind, has yet to pick up speed,

Whatever the water whispers, is just too still,

Whatever the next day brings, I'll be ready to make its will.

Do you miss me? I ache for you.

Do you need me? I long for you.

Do you think of me? I dream of you.

Do you see me? You are the light of my day.

Because of you, I want to live.

The unexpected save.

I sank, in the cold waters of my own uncertainty.

I knew it, it numbed, it dulled, it hurt in spikes,

Hypothermia of emotions, what a weird comfort.

I decided to reach out, well knowing no one was there,

But to my surprise something made contact.

Hesitation flooded me, but decided to hold on.

I first tugged, but receded to the other pull.

Water break! A fresh gasp of air...

Renewed, my rescuer had been gone. 

Suddenly I realized I was alone but I could see the shore.

I had saved my self all along, 

Yet still need to say thanks the for the nudge.

If it hurts, is it love?

It ebbs and flows, this love and pain,
to know that you are out there,
to sense the indifference of space,
to have to wait and ache.
Your taste and scent are still there,
I close my eyes and your silhouette does not fade,
that voice keeps echoing in my head,
the motion that caresses the ghost of your shape.

I keep reminding myself that I have to keep my self at bay,
the forces that be, I respect so I keep away.
Perhaps one day there will be a wind for my sail,
it just tears me to know that my ship might never leave dock.
That in order to have some sort of form,
to start upon a rock,
I must first let you go.

Just thinking..

My vision still seeks you,

Everything I do has a dedication,

Everywhere I go, I feel hints of you,

Places I've been to, don't measure without you.

I confess to a bittersweet tear.

I must confess to a bittersweet tear,
one that is as intense as the summer sun,
that can burn and comfort all together.
With a sensation of a light shining, clarifying,
purifying and unfiltered by a clear sky.
It carries a pain that opens my eyes,
only to see that life is before me
and for the first time in a long time,
I truly feel.

I must confess for a bittersweet tear,
I did not see my self here,
I contemplated nothing close to this flow,
a depth so quickly unfolded.
I fear this wave of feelings, the potential untapped,
and my willingness to risk.
So steady is how I thread,
at the distance that beckons the respect deserved.

I must confess with a bittersweet tear,
I've never before felt so alive,
with just the right amount of broken,
that breaks the old crust, sheds the old skin,
cleans this battered soul,
a new chapter ready to begin.

I confess.. I'm alive again.

¿Qué es lo que me haces?

A veces pienso en olvidarte,
pero no puedo entre las memorias y tu sonrisa,
cuando bajo las estrellas nos pegó la brisa.
Porque aunque no quisiera recordarte,
eres ya parte de mi vida, historia día con día,
mi alma derramada en el lienzo de tu compañía.
¿Cuándo es que llegaste a mi interior?
Me has invitado al columpio de los sueños,
tanto que me gusta, pero de repente me mareo.
Empiezas a dolerme, tan temprano y lejos,
Si así ha de ser, lo único que pido es que no me dejes caer...

Another post of loving music

Holy shit, am I on a natural/music high right now...

Despite some rather sad events happening in my life right now, I have found a huge solace in music. There have been other important ones like new and old friendships, my programming passion and some plain old good luck. Back to music tho. Through spotify I have been able to create a very decent list of songs that I like and that has enabled me to somehow focus my moods. That alone is beneficial in recognizing and isolating a feeling to better address it and not go from one to another thus ending up with no sense of order.

Powerful cords, melodic keyboards, surprising arrangements and resonating lyrics. Music. Saying that I love music falls is more like a disservice because it does not even come close. So, the genre that moves me time and time again is progressive. It's more like a meta-genre because I found out I like all kinds of progressive music, whether it's metal, power, rock, pop, electronic, etc. You name it, it it's progressive, I'm there.

So what is it about prog? It's hard to say because each genre has a different way of implementation. As a whole I think it's the fact that the songs are like a story or a movie. It seems like it has different rhythms, it ebbs and flows, it has a climax, a conclusion. It's not just a repeat of choruses and verses. A polish DJ by the name of SynSun has some really interesting tracks where the climax part is really clear, the way the song sets a mood in the start but you end up in a different place altogether by the end. Another genre, another band, A.C.T from Sweden, has a more pop rock sound but still has the elements of progressive by combining subject matter in lyrics, which sometimes seem over simplistic but it comes  with a complex melody. This is great because it totally breaks some implicit rule that the lyrics have to be poetic or metaphorical to make it 'good'. Over in England we have Frost*, which is classified as a 'Neo-progressive Supergroup'. Which is like a dream team of sorts, accomplished professionals that their sum is greater than whole, but to me is emergence through music. Whoa..

Those are just my latest musical affairs. And to close this post, a thought I had in this night where my right brain decided to emerge at its fullest: Everyone should have an affair with music.. If you don't have one, you should. There is music for everyone, of all tastes and styles.

A runner's mentality

A runner doesn't run away, a runner runs ahead.